Entrapped

Each day it’s becoming hard to escape
I keep moving around and around in this maze that I made
The blueprint seems to have changed, I have forgotten the exit
Its time I begin to reclaim.
The dance of flesh I became a regular audience of
Encores and guilty satisfactions gripped more than my curious soul
Brief moments of weakness turned longer each day
I forgot where to draw the line
Forgot how my idle mind would refuse to stay away
Enticing! Each face, each body and their game
I watched them play, sometimes I wanted to play.
I knew how their world worked
I knew I was one of the spectators feeding my unholy urge
Escape from a bondage self created needed more than just a fearful will
I needed Houdini’s secret key I needed some magic for the spell was too strong to flea.
Sometimes wisdom struck like an unlikely lighting bolt
I knew how they transformed Chitrakala to Candy
I knew how they would teach her the games
Teach her to play them well, make her play them till she was spent
I know you got us to watch; we fuelled your dirty living
I despise my pathetic needs, for it gave you your ratings
But sage easily fades sensations are more complex to let go.
I don’t want this to turn into a battle that I’d keep fighting and lose
I would rather retreat from the battle grounds than be a puppet at your hands
My vice I know I must escape, Relapse I can no longer entertain
Spectator I shall no longer be.